Don't Look Back

The call finally came.  Things were set and they were ready to begin my treatments.  The past month had been what seemed a never ending series of tests, scans, and assorted procedures.  At times I began to doubt my decision to go with proton therapy.  But, I kept remembering what the surgeon had said, “You are facing a lot of options; but once you make your decision don’t look back.”

Don’t look back.  That is so much easier said than done. With all the unanswered questions no one could really answer, it seemed only natural to begin to doubt my decision.  My doubt, however, was erased in one clear emphatic event.

On the third Saturday of each month Provision hosts a tour of the facilities.  This is not just a “here is the treatment room” tour.  No, they take you into the bowels of the center, showing off the cyclotron and explaining the physics and history of proton therapy.  That is then followed with a viewing of the treatment rooms.  There you see the bed where you will lay, the x-rays used to aim the protons, the proton “gun” (I don't know what else to call it), and the room where the therapists hide so they do not get hit by any renegade protons.

None of that was what really caught my attention; instead it was a simple piece of paper.  Taped on the wall, just to the left, where you could see it while lying on the bed, was an 8.5x11 sheet of paper.  In simple block letters were the words:

And the peace of God,

which surpasses all understanding,

will keep your hearts and minds

in Christ Jesus.  Phil. 4:7

I stood there staring at it in disbelief.  Who had put it there and how did they know I needed peace regarding my decision?  The hand of God always amazes me.  It made me eager to start my treatments so I could find how and why the paper was there.

Yesterday when I went for my first treatment I found that the scripture had been removed.  It had been replaced with:

Whatever is true, whatever is honorable,

whatever is just, whatever is pure,

whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable,

if there is any excellence,

if there is anything worthy of praise,

think about these things.  Phil. 4:8

So, today I asked one of the therapists about the scripture.  She told me that she had a friend who, while receiving treatment, had requested the posting so she could work on memorizing the passage from Philippians 4. I had to tell her that she may not have known it but verse seven had been posted for me.  And because of that there has been no looking back.